The Mad Scorpion

32.
.
LOST FINALE: Once upon a time, I watched a show. I watched a show for six years.
I watched Every Single Episode of a show for six years.
I watched a show with the kind of dedication it takes to look after a baby. You nurture it, you love it, you burp it at night…
And then that show grew up, moved out, and called me a Bitch on its way.
YUCK, ICK, UGH, PFFT, and CACK.
I WILL admit that it was VERY PRETTY, and had certainly dressed itself up to the nines before it left, but…
Well let’s put it this way – a really long way.
You can dress up a donkey in a rabbit suit, and take it to the pet show and tell everyone it’s a rabbit, and some of the people might even believe it but most everyone is looking at the donkey in a rabbit suit thinking “Hmmm, I dunno about that rabbit… looks a bit like a donkey in a rabbit suit. But it’s doing some pretty amazing tricks!”
And then just after the donkey in a rabbit suit has impressed the pants off of everyone and is being trotted out of the pet show with a big blue ribbon for Best Rabbit, the bright fluorescent lights of the exit lobby do their trick and suddenly everyone can see that the “amazing rabbit” is very clearly a donkey in a rabbit suit, and now the people feel offended and a little bit foolish for believing the amazing rabbit’s tricks…
It’s kinda like that.
THUMBS WAAAAAAAAAAAY DOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWN.
Does anyone know where I can find the last six years of my life please??

.
VISITS FROM FRIENDS:
I LOVE it when my friends visit, and I’ve been very lucky to have had two visits from old friends this week!
Last week my friend from Auckland popped into work, though this was actually the suckiest visit because she breezed in and out in less than ten minutes to go pick up a couch… UN-impressed.
And realistically, Not better than nothing.
But then on Sunday I got a surprise visit from another old school friend, Christie Cameron. Christie and I have known each other since I was 14 and she was 13, and we catch up sporadically over the years, and, like the best friendships do, we always pick up right where we left off. I love that.
She stayed for over an hour – HEAVEN! – and we talked non-stop. I was a little hungover from my wine-guzzling Lost session, but that hardly slowed me down.
Christie is getting MARRIED THIS SUMMER and I LOOOOOOOOOOVE going to old friends weddings! I used to be kinda cynical and grossed-out by the whole marriage concept – one person for life? REALLY?? – but I have to say that over the years, as I’ve watched people I love declaring their love for one another, my heart has definitely softened to the idea. Not to say that those particular marriages have always lasted BUT… I think the idea of celebrating a relationship that makes your friends sickeningly happy is One Damn Good Reason To Celebrate. And also a great reason to buy a new outfit.
Congratulations to my friend Christie and my-friend-by-association-whom-I’ve-yet-to-meet Tim.
I can’t wait to celebrate your big day with you!!!
.

A POEM:
This week I went digging
in the dirt of my ancestors
as I helped clean my friends
fathers’ grave.
I dug up the weeds
and the worms,
and I couldn’t help but realise
that my friends father
was now the dirt
and maybe even
inside the worms stomach.
I was muddy,
and sweaty,
before ten in the morning…
I liked the feeling of dirt
underneath my fingernails.
.